Once upon a time, there was a Kingdom. A land in the sky, on a rainbow. It was known by the few children who believed of its existence as the Kingdom of the Unicorns, a safe haven where the single-horned creatures could reside, and live a peaceful and joyous lifestyle. Life was simple, and well lived, as none of the unicorns ever died.
Each unicorn had a job. Most were Cutie farmers, plucking the sweet orange delicacies from the special bushes from which they grew. Others were builders, constructing villages on the rainbow. Others still were engineers who maintained the Magic Rainbow Generators, which used a form of unmeltable ice that picked up the rays of the sun, creating the beautiful colors of the arc. Beyond these main jobs, of course there were doctors, mailmen, computer programmers, and many more that could be listed, but I’d rather not go over. But, the most important of all of these was the Head of the State: The King of the Kingdom of Unicorns.
Since the beginning, these Kings came from a line of royalty with a white hide and a pink and purple mane, with a horn the color of ivory. All of these kings were kind, compassionate, and just, and swore an oath to protect the realm. Except for one. One named Norbert.
One thing I must clarify: Unicorns can die. It’s just they are biologically immortal. So, if one dies in battle, then they’re dead. Forever. And that’s exactly what happened to Norbert’s dad, Cornelius. He fell off the rainbow. A quite unfortunate death.
This was why Norbert came to the throne prematurely. As a result of his young age, he had few responsibilities before then, and now had a whole kingdom. As a result of this, he was unqualified, and lost among the duties earned upon wearing the crown. So, he swore the oath with no thought to it, and became king.
After a few years, the Rainbow began to fall apart. Norbert was quite clueless, and had no idea of what government actually was, and didn't understand much to begin with anyway. For example, taxes was a word which to him was a mystery wrapped in an enigma; so, not really getting what they were, he raised them. A lot. He also changed the item of taxes to the Cutie, which he loved so much, causing him to grow quite large in a lateral matter. Soon, despite his short stature, he was 3 times the size of the average unicorn. He also didn't understand diplomacy; he created a large war against the Realm of the Easter Bunnies, a 3 faction conflict between himself, the Pegasus Republic, and Nyan Land, and a massive world war loomed still between them and the Grand Duchy of Dragonia. This didn't bother him, but when he was stressed, he did what he did best: eat Cuties.
One day, Norbert sat at the edge of his garden pavillion which overlooked the world below. He saw some ducks fly through the sky, and thought to himself about the wonders of flight. He then saw a unicorn fly off the rainbow, going about, and another, and another still. He became curious. Had he been blind this whole time to the fact that Unicorns could fly? He went to his castle to read about this.
Dragging himself into the library, he picked up a book on the History of Unicorn Flight. Well, that confirmed it right there. He paged through and found a How To Section.
Step 1: Believe.
Sounded simple enough.
Step 2: Jump (while still believing) and look towards the sky as you thrust your body towards the clouds.
Not that hard.
Step 3: After a few seconds, you should be flying. This can be determined by observing if a rainbow trail appears from behind you.*
Easy. So he went off outside. But he never saw the asterisk at the end of Step 3. This particular asterisk lead to a footnote at the bottom of the page. And that footnote said the following:
*Do not attempt flight if you exceed the weight limit.
Standing at the edge of the rainbow, he saw a V of Canadian Geese flying. I can fly, he thought. I can fly. I can fly!
He believed. He looked to the sky while jumping, thrusting his body toward the clouds. But no rainbow appeared behind him. So he fell.
And fell.
And fell.
THUD.
He hit the rainbow, and a crack appeared along it. The western edge separated, and began to fall. As it did, color dissolved from it as the generators no longer powered it, and the bottom began to shatter into a million shards, disappearing as it went.
To say it plainly, everyone died. I’m all about happy endings, but quite simply, that was what happened.
Almost.
There was one who survived.
And that was none other than Norbert.
THE END.
